ALBUM LYRICS: The songs that didn’t make the final cut

All of the words below were written by Peter Wyngarde. No notes were left with regard to tempo, instrumentation, other music reference points, save for the words ‘Ballad’ and ‘To be sung as if drunk’ on two of the lyric sheets.

Please be reminded that all the lyrics below are copyrighted to Tina-Wyngarde-Hopkins and Bowington Management.

1 Colour TV

It’s so trendy to be a colour
all that fuss about who’s in power
No one knew who to love or hate
but now it’s purple red and green
Blood transfusions in on colour television

Mind you, it is a little confusing
when Sammy Davis says he’s Jewish
And looks more red than red Indian
so does Pope Pius and being Yiddish
Blood transfusions in on colour television

And then all these Vietnamese
North or South seem none too pleased
Their skins are greener than the trees
and G.I. Joes browner than Heinz baked beans
It is confusing since they call each other yellow
in good ol’ Americanise
Blood transfusions in in colour TV’s
Of course the real joy’s to come

when they televise parliament
and Georgie Brown looks blue to some
in spite of Scotch and Murray mints
And Barbara Castle’s a soft of magenta plum
Blood transfusions in cool television

But it’s the revolutioning students
that are by far the trendiest
And change their colour the fastest
from bloody blue, white and red
To the grey sobriety of hospital bed
as they slide from violence to passivity and silence
Blood transfusions in on colour TV

2 D.J.

Roll your R’s to prove you’re no homo
Add a pun to make it fun
A voice more stereo than mono
you’re bound to be a DJ on 1

Chat up the guys and dolls and talk of peace
call them lad and lassies, of course peace is neece
Add to this Scots whoo-hooI monotony
a discombobulating cacophony

And you have Stewart Henry and the like
Every morning, noon and night
Telling us what is a hit or a miss
what disc to buy and what to cross off your list
I’m just hoping for the day they go on strike
Praying they miss their bus, are late or break their mic
Do let the music have an unadulterated run
Cut out all the constipated fun on Radio 1
but then of course we won’t know the titles of anyone’s
album because words don’t seem to count anymore
Just the mixing, beat and backtracking on some
so Stewart stay and save us from another one

3 Marie

Marie looks across her window above the trees
the men all down below enjoy all they can see
She’s a woman of nature that life brought into the world to play with
And she looks so sad
’cause she’s lonely, Marie

She never hurries to put on her underwear
her only real friend is a yellow teddy bear. Marie, Marie.

Marie, only you cannot see
the more you have the less you will be free
Butterscotch, acid drops, trips too with tea

Marie lies on a pillow next to a bed
the men who visit her don’t see what’s in her head
She’s going on a journey
that’s kinder and faster than any they’ve made
closed door, not alone anymore. Marie, Marie.

She never hurries to put on her underwear
her only real friend is a yellow teddy bear. Marie, Marie.

Marie, only you cannot see

(Repeat this to end).

4 Merry Sexmas

(Spoken as if drunk)

What is all this fuss o’er Xmas
s’cuse us is it to do with – love
Why is everyone so sexless
he must have had some fun above

After all it is his birthday
no one’s born without someone’s horn
Proclaiming it is a mirth day
and the night is no time to mourn
But time to have more jollity
And practise his philosophy
Turning to other cheek rapidly
for kisses from the majority

Good will and love for all men
let’s all have a cuddle and a drink
Even that loner in No.10
Might make that cheek turn quite pink

All that matters is for us to love
give the old world a piece of dove
Have one another, sod givin’ (I’m drunk)
a’int we all God’s chill’un

5 Robinson Crusoe’s Story

The night was thick and hazy
When the ‘Piccadilly Daisy’
Carried down the crew and captain in the sea;
And I think the water drowned ‘em
For they never, ever found ‘em
And I know they didn’t come ashore with me

Oh ‘twas very sad and lonely
When I found myself the only
Population on this cultivated shore;
But I’ve made a little tavern
In a rocky little cavern
And I sit and watch for people at the door

I spent no time in looking
For a girl to do my cooking
As I’m quite a clever hand at making stews;
Perhaps that fellow Friday
Just to keep the tavern tidy
And to put a Sunday polish on my shoes

I have a little garden
That I’m cultivating lard in
as the things I eat are rather tough and dry;
For I live on toasted lizards
Prickly pears and parrot gizzards
And I’m really very fond of beetle pie

The clothes I had were furry
And it made me fret and worry
When I found the moths were eating off the hair;
And I had to scrape and sand ‘em
And I boiled ‘em and I tanned ‘em
’Till I got the fine Morocco suit I wear

I sometimes see diversions
In family excursions
With a few domestic animals you see;
And we take along a carrot
As refreshment for the parrot
And a little can of jungleberry tea

Then we gather as we travel
Bits of moss and dirty gravel
And we chip off little specimens of stone;
And will carry home the prizes
Funny bugs of handy sizes
Just to give the day of scientific tone

If the roads are wet and muddy
We remain at home and study
For the goat is very clever at a sum;
And the dog instead of fighting
Studies ornamental writing
While the cat is taking lessons on the drum

We retire at eleven
And we rise again at seven
And I wish to call attention as I close;
To the fact that all the scholars
Are correct about their collars
In particular in turning out their toes

6 Silent Thanks To Noisy Yanks

Why are Americans so demonstrative
are they worried they won’t be noticed?
That they have to be more remonstrative
Than any other country listed

From juvenile delinquency to God
is longer than any trip to Mars and back
Why make all that fuss about the sod
And the fairy brigade when all is black
without the aid of any lease-lend pact

Maybe it’s because they’re worried
about the state of violent destructive
groups that have sprung from their roots of palsied need
And feel the time is now to be reconstructive – in deed

If not invoice at least some gesture
that democratic move presages failure
to all the innocence that need blackmailers to excuse their greed
With soldiers and sailors to guard that little countries shops and retailers?

Wouldn’t it be oh so much wiser
to forget their noisy publicity
And quietly reform (so much nicer)
At home where all the trouble lies
with love – no guns – so no one dies

7 To Call A Man A Man – Is A State of Grace

(Spoken):
You may remember students demonstrating outside the White House with placards with the names of the fallen at Vietnam

A fence like sentinels in wait
as names echo on the lawns
of the House of white

The spikes like tombstones at dawn
salute the old and the new that died
Wasserman, Daniels and Cohen
both Kennedy’s, King and Lincoln

All are on common ground
they fought and died for freedom
That cry out of sight and sound
even to those who cannot see them
Is this the place for that cry which says
To call man a man
is a state of grace no man can deny

8 Why Do Taxi Drivers Talk So Much?

Why do taxi drivers talk so much?
Is it because they want to tax our nerves
Chat, chat in between each move of the clutch
to the boiling point of no reserve

Do they already know we’re far too late
And nothing they say could possibly
make or alter that important date?

Or is it because they are fed up too
with traffic, price of living, taxes
(The government informs are overdue like this fast becoming talking taxi)

Really, what is he going on about?
Mind that truck! Wish I were walking
Did you see that? He didn’t shout
I would have done! He just went on talking

What was that? Oh yes, the Permissive Society
yes I do agree with it
What’s that? Wish your missus did
Oh, I see (spoken quietly)
(Maybe that would be a bit TOO permissive!)

No, no I don’t think age has anything…
(Look out! The bus was nearly on us!)
No, if your own thing is really jumping in and out of her bras
it’s a gas (spoken quietly)

I only hope for your sake they’re stretch proof!
No, I don’t think that makes you a poofe
(wish I could be as optimistic
about my life on this endless trip).
“Is she?” (definitely masochistic!)
“Oh, when you jumped your wife did a flip” (Well, if you really jumped – sadistic).
“No, I didn’t think she was in ‘em
you prefer short ones to the linen?”
(“I’m sure you do – wish you button up. Don’t really care what either of you do”)
“She wants a what – a Pekinese pup?”
What’s he going on about now? The last war!
Oh no not that I’m late for the premiere.
(I was a conscientious objector – that was until I met this taxi bore!).

“Where you? (I’m so glad) The Royal Pay Corps?”
(I wish they’d paid you off). Open the door, I can’t stand anymore!
“Drop me off cabby!”
(No tip – lip. You’ve been too gabby)
“How much?” Well, no, it’s a beautiful day
I was should have walked all the way
16 bob? No, no, keep the change you deserve the tip”
Never know – might give up bras, swap them for gymslips

(Sound of cab door banging).

Note: The album was also to include a reading of the poem, ‘If I Have Made, My Lady’, written by E.E. Cummings.

Click below for more information on Peter’s album…

Album & CD Information

Album Lyrics

REVIEW: Jesus of Nazareth

Broadcast Dates:

A prologue was shown before the series proper entitled, ‘Preparing the Way’

Episode 1: ‘The Beloved Son’ – Broadcast: Sunday 19th February, 1956
Episode 2: ‘Jesus the Healer – Broadcast: Sunday 26th February, 1956
Episode 3: ‘Jesus the Teacher’ – Broadcast: Sunday 4th March, 1956
Episode 4: ‘Jesus the King’ – Broadcast: Sunday 11th March, 1956
Episode 5: ‘The Road to Jerusalem’ – Broadcast: Sunday March 18th, 1956
Episode 6: ‘Behold the Man’ – Broadcast: Sunday 25th March, 1956
Episode 7: ‘I Am Always With You’ – Broadcast: Sunday 1st April, 1956

Character: John the Baptist

Peter as John the Baptist

In 1956, the BBC made Television history with a series of eight programmes on the life of Christ. Before this production censorship regulations prohibited the portrayal of Christ by an actor in public performances. It was only after the Central Religious Council approved the project, and the choice of actor in the central role, that the BBC were given the go-ahead.

Treated as an experiment, Jesus of Nazareth was placed in the children’s programmes slot on Sundays. But it attracted an adult audience whose appreciation placed it, as a BBC survey showed, next to the Coronation of 1953 in national appeal.

The series was produced by Joy Harington and would be considered her most notable work for television, for which she received the 1956 award of the Guild of Television Producers and Directors, the first to be presented for a children’s serial. Tom Fleming created a moving interpretation of Christ, and unusually for a live serial, with filmed locations in Galilee and Jerusalem, it was telerecorded so it could be reshown over the Easter holidays in future years. The scenes, especially of the Crucifixion, were regarded as some of the most powerful ever televised.

Writing in the Radio Times in February 1956, Freda Lingstrom, the Head of Children’s Television, wrote: ‘Our aim is to awaken the interest of children in the origins of the most significant influence in their lives, and help them to understand something of the background against which the Christian story was enacted.’

Lingstrom went on to explain the approach that the producer had taken; ‘In spite of this widely practised attempt to put the story of Jesus into modern speech, reverence for ‘Holy Writ’ remains for many people as sacrosanct as the spiritual truth it sought to present in the reign of James the First. It may come as a shock to some people that, although phrases which become household words remain, the cycle of plays we are about to represent will be in modern colloquial speech.’

In order to embark on such an important and ground-breaking project, advice was sought from several members of the clergy, whose scholarship and wide theological knowledge were put at the disposal of Joy Harrington, who wrote the eight scripts which began with Jesus as a boy of twelve, living in an occupied country, and ended with the Resurrection.

For the all-important casting, Harrington wanted an actor who was strong, virile, full of life and energy and convinced of his mission. Tom Fleming, born in Edinburgh, Scotland, in June 1927, was relatively unknown to television audiences in 1956, having only appeared in half-a-dozen productions, which were all single plays. The son of a Baptist preacher, he was initially anxious about playing the part. It was his interest in the spiritual value of the project that finally convinced him to undertake a part which, according the Freda Lingstrom, he approached with humility and a high sense of purpose.

In the spring of 1955, Fleming and Harrington and a contingent of the Children’s Film Unit, travelled to the Middle East, where certain sequences were shot in order to enrich the live productions. As Freda Lingstrom wrote; ‘Children will see him as Jesus in the scorching sun of the wilderness with hot desert wind blowing his robes and hair in disorder, far from the lifeless coloured-print image stamped on the minds of so many.’

This was a huge undertaking for the BBC. It was unheard of, prior to this, to take a film unit abroad to record original material for any of their productions. No doubt the Corporation was very much aware of the possible impact the series of plays could have. Especially if they got it wrong.

Linstrom again; ‘Throughout, the plays will present happenings in a straightforward manner with little emphasis on the miraculous. It is not our intention to rationalise events, nor shall we put forward any new interpretation of the gospels; our purpose is to offer children as true a picture as we can with the weight of authority behind it. Throughout, the humanity, courage and endurance of Jesus will be manifest; we shall not minimise the tragedy of the Crucifixion but care will be taken to see that it will be presented in such a way as to give older children food for thought while in no way alarming younger ones or leaving them with any suggestion of horror.’

Summing up, Lingstrom offered a word of advice to parents. Advice that most likely ensured an increased adult audience for what was seemingly being presented as a children’s series: ‘It should be remembered that this project is designed for older children and parents are asked to see that younger ones should not see the play alone.’ Nice bit of marketing.

Jesus of Nazareth began on Sunday 12 February 1956 with ‘The Prologue’. The play opened with a boy of twelve travelling with his parents to Jerusalem for the Passover feast. Jesus is seen talking with the elders in the Temple and subsequently found by Mary and Joseph and taken home. The eighth and final part of the series was broadcast on Easter Day.

In 1977, a British-Italian co-production was produced for television under the same title.

Trivia:

The series was partly shot in Galilee and Jerusalem.

Making the series was a courageous undertaking. At that time, censorship regulations prohibited the portrayal of Christ by an actor in public performances.

The series was commended by The Guild of Film and Television Directors.

After it’s first broadcast in 1956, the series was reshown every Easter for three years afterwards.

The following was written by Mark Goodacre – Professor of New Testament and Christian Origins at Duke University, in the Religious Studies Department.

So, have you ever seen the TV series Jesus of Nazareth? No, not that series, but the one made twenty years earlier by the BBC? Me neither. In fact I didn’t even know about it until yesterday. Here’s the story.

I have been reporting recently on my research into the forgotten BBC production Paul of Tarsus (1960) ), research which led to the book of the series produced by its writer, producer and director Joy Harington. In the preface to that book, she writes the following:

The idea for this book and the Television series that preceded it was born in 1956 when the series ‘Jesus of Nazareth’ ended with these words from Jesus to his disciples: ‘Go and teach all nations the things that you have seen and heard . . . . . And know that I am with you always — even unto the end of the world.’ It left one with the feeling ‘What happened then?’ After all, it was a big order to give a handful of fishermen and peasants in a small occupied country . . .

And so on. So, it seems, there was a TV series on Jesus’ life broadcast in 1956 on the BBC. I didn’t think I had heard of this before, so I went to the net to see how many others had heard of it. The answer is: very few.

The IMDb weakly mentions Jesus of Nazareth from 1953, starring Tom Fleming. In the light of the above, the date is certainly wrong. Is it even the same production? Well, it looks like it is because this TV series clearly featured Tom Fleming playing Jesus. There is a good paragraph or so on it on the BFI’s Screenonline. Profile of Joy Harington:

But perhaps what is considered her most notable work for television was the eight-part Sunday serial Jesus of Nazareth (BBC, 1956) for which she received the 1956 award of the Guild of Television Producers and Directors (now BAFTA), the first to be presented for a children’s serial. A live studio production with exteriors filmed on location in Galilee and Jerusalem, it was a courageous undertaking. At that time, censorship regulations prohibited the portrayal of Christ by an actor in public performances. However, the Central Religious Council approved the project and Tom Fleming was cast as Jesus Christ. The serial was an outstanding success. Harington followed with a similar ten-part series, Paul of Tarsus (BBC, 1960), for which the exteriors were filmed mainly in Crete.

So we now know that Paul of Tarsus was filmed in Crete, and Jesus of Nazareth was partly filmed in Israel, and the latter was considered “a children’s serial”. There is more research to be done about this lost series, and I look forward to reporting back on this in due course.

Above: A page from the Radio Times (12th April, 1957) – published to coincide with the first rescreening of the series at Easter that year.